Happy Birthday!

Today, Shaye is 9
it is hard to believe how fast time seems to have gone
I can hardly believe it has been nine years ago since your birth
and I take pride in watching you grow
I see you identify yourself through your personality
I love watching you help others...
it makes my heart skip a beat
your genuine personality is contagious
your smile melts my heart...
I am so lucky to call myself your mom
and I get to call you my daughter

I wish you many more years of happiness 
and a day full of wonder

2 months

how can it possibly be 2 months ago that I welcomed
another perfect creation into my life
and at the same time I think it seems like forever ago
that I met and began to say goodbye...
life changes so swiftly and through circumstances placed in my path
I am given great opportunities to grow and heal
God has opened and closed doors
and revealed to me His greatness
through buried pain, resentments, hurts and healing
As I say goodbye and close parts of my life I never wanted to confront
I sense a peace surrounding life and the next chapters
Many times I have wondered and questioned how things would work out
...looking back, I know I couldnt have planned it better
it has never made it easy...
but it has always made it right

today....the legalization of adoption in court

legally terminated my parental rights
but regardless what a piece of paper
a court document
or judge say
no one or any thing can ever legally terminate
the love I feel for this child
the dreams I hold for her future
my desire for her to have a gratifying life
my need to spend time with her
my ability to be a good role model and positive example
sharing with her the gift of all her siblings
the care and compassion that I will always hold
the special bond we will always share

one month ago

I met for the first time

  a beautiful child

that shared my DNA

...I touched her soft delicate skin

...I held her tender fingers

...I stroked her silky hair

...I kissed every inch of her body

...I imagined a lifetime of wonder and awe

...I gazed into her eyes

...I savored her newborn scent 

...I embraced a special bond as her birth mother

...I fell in love

Happy Birthday #13

Today I celebrate my second daughter becoming a teenager...

I now hav 2 teenagers in the house and cannot grasp 

"where has the time gone? "

life moves along all too swiftly

and I so desperately want to savor all

the moments good and bad

that I get to share with each of my children...

I wish my beautiful, intelligent, kind, compassionate, 
strong, capable, creative, shining, talented daughter 
an excellent day and a bright year ahead!

Newborn babies,

oh the grandest of things,

{if LOVE were enough}

except for all of

the responsibility and

reality a newborn

baby brings…

Little sister growing within,

To the news of your arrival we did grin.

We have helped mommy as best we can,

When we are able a hand we do lend.

Ecstatic to learn of a sister joining our family,

Unsure of the plans for adoption to be.